Billboard’s Songs of the Summer: “Blurred Lines”, and 9 Songs That Wanted To Beat It

Posted on September 16, 2013 by bgibs122

With summer “officially” over with, Billboard has released their annual list of the top ten songs of the summer (Memorial Day-Labor Day). Normally, I just go through the list bottom to top for suspense, but this year, giving away that “Blurred Lines” got the top spot is like saying “there’s meth” on Breaking Bad. So, I thought I’d go through the list as usual, but look at how the song could have beat “Blurred Lines”, how close its chance was, and ultimately, why it didn’t. Let’s start at the bottom.

10. Selena Gomez – Come and Get It

How “Come and Get It” could have come and gotten it: Gomez, like her former Disney cohort Miley Cyrus, spent the summer announcing her transition from calculated teen pop act to calculated pop star. The two are polar opposites in their approach, though: Cyrus has a shock-tactics heavy, dramatic, rebellious image, whereas Gomez treats “Come and Get It” with the same professionalism she’s given to her music career so far. Goemz seems like she wants to play the pop long game, and “Come and Get It” is part of that: it follows the trends while being listenable on its own, ala Rihanna.

Could It Beat “Blurred Lines”? Nope.

Why the hell not? Sure, the dubstep-tinged production’s good and the hook’s there, but at the end of the day, “Come and Get It” is too by-numbers to be anything more than good.

9. Anna Kendrick – Cups (When I’m Gone)

How “Cups” Could Have Scooped the Top Spot: “Cups” is the only song on the list that comes close to competing with “Blurred Lines” for sheer cultural permeability. Originally from the aca-unbearably overquoted movie Pitch Perfect, “Cups” made it to the charts through sheer force of lovable, quirky catchiness and everyone learning that cups game (…me included). It finally broke through once club mixes started getting radio airplay, but once it hit, it stuck. Anna Kendrick is as baffled as the rest of us.

Could It Beat “Blurred Lines”? Not really, but I want to give it the moral victory anyway.

Why the Hell Not? “Cups”, underneath it all, wasn’t made to exist as a chart topper: it’s a movie tie-in release. At best, it was supposed to sell ~300k units on iTunes, maybe hit the lowest reaches of the charts for a month, and become your school’s a capella group’s hat trick for a few years. The fact that it made its way here is impressive enough.

8. Bruno Mars – Treasure

How “Treasure” Could Have Been the Crown Jewel: Bruno’s last two Unorthodox Jukebox singles went to number 1, so “Treasure” is already going in as a contender. With its retro-soul sound including bouncing basslines and funky rhythm guitar riff, the song’s as deliberately throwback as Mars has gotten in his career, but still in line with current trends (and seriously apes Off the Wall era Michael Jackson).

Could It Beat Blurred Lines: Had a shot, but no.

Why the Hell Not? Picking up steam mid-summer didn’t help, for one, and “Treasure”‘s biggest weakness as a song is that it place genre a little too straight for mass appeal.

7. Justin Timberlake – Mirrors

How “Mirrors” Could Have Reflected Greater Success: “Mirrors” spent some time at no. 2, and might actually outdo “Suit & Tie” by year’s end. It’s one of the stronger tracks off The 20/20 Experience (especially since most radio stations omit the extended outro), and the classic Timbaland production and adoring nature of the song make it feel timeless.

Could It Beat “Blurred Lines”? Close, but not quite.

Why the Hell Not? Like The 20/20 Experience as a whole, “Mirrors” falls just too heavy on the art side of art-pop to get the number one spot, and a long runtime for the song/video didn’t help things.

6. Florida Georgia Line ft. Nelly – Cruise

How It Could Have “Cruised” to number 1: By not being a piece of lowest common denominator country interbred with lowest common denominator hip-hop for a claustrophobic and scholocky remix (I do not like this song). The wide appeal got it this high, but a lack of starpower (and quality) kept it from going any higher.

Could It Beat “Blurred Lines”? Not by a mile.

Why the Hell Not? Lack of “tastemaker” appeal; “Cruise” might have been Middle America’s choice, but it came up short with the “hip” crowd in pop. And it’s a miserable remix of a stooge of a song to begin with.

5. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis ft. Ray Dalton – Can’t Hold Us

How “Can’t Hold Us” Could Have Held the Top Spot: Snack Attacklemore’s first and to date only non-gimmick hit works best when viewed as a four minute workout for producer Ryan Lewis, who produces “Can’t Hold Us” like it’s soundtracking an action sequence. The shout along bridge and outro, galloping beat, stabbing piano, and huge synths make for a great instrumental, and ‘more brings the energy (if not the writing) to his verses.

Could It Beat “Blurred Lines”? If time worked differently, maybe. But as is, no.

Why the Hell Not? If anyone had the intense fanbase and the hype to make it to no. 1, it was Macklemore, and “Can’t Hold Us” was number one for a month. But that month was mid-May to mid-June, meaning it peaked too early to bring numbers for the Summer charts.

4. Miley Cyrus – We Can’t Stop

Why It Might Have Stopped at Number One: For her first All Growed Up single, Cyrus took the “Come for the trainwreck, stay for the controversy” route in promoting “We Can’t Stop”. As a song, it’s a little too tepid, but certainly catchy, and Cyrus hasn’t been…ah, shy about promoting it. As far as controversy and thinkpieces, “We Can’t Stop” only takes second to “Blurred Lines”. And while I’m talking about the song, listen to this lovely doowop cover.

Could It Beat “Blured Lines”? With slightly different timing, possibly.

Why the Hell Didn’t It? Blame it on a (relatively) late release/pick up time, during which “Blurred Lines” had already insulated itself. Now with “Roar” and “Berzerk” ahead of it, it looks like number 1’s escaping Cyrus again.

3. Daft Punk – Get Lucky

How It Could Have “Gotten Lucky” with the charts: If one of these songs was going to top “Blurred Lines”, everyone put their money on it being “Get Lucky”, the other blast-from-the-past disco-y funk jam with Pharrell Williams on vocals. With stellar production, great instrumentation, the trademark Daft Punk robot vocals in the mix, a percussion based breakdown, and a great/super catchy melody, this was the one people thought would do it.

Could It Beat “Blurred Lines”? In a fair fight? Almost definitely. In reality? Well…

Why the Hell Not? This one comes down to promotion. While true “Get Lucky”, to me at least, is just a touch too repetitive for its own good (does it want to be a pop song or a dance song?), the clincher was “Blurred Lines”‘s lightning rod of a music video. Bad press is still press, and Daft Punk’s entire promotional campaign for “Get Lucky”/Random Access Memories ended the day the album dropped without “Lucky” ever getting a video. It’s not a clean win, but oh well.

2. Imagine Dragons – Radioactive

How It Could Have Gone Nuclear at Number One: Number one songs need mass appeal, and “Radioactive” certainly has that down pact. Filtering dubstep through a typical band setup means that damn near everyone is going to jam to your music, and indeed, “Radioactive” feels ready to sell every product you could possibly need. “Radioactive” has had the longest incubation time of anything on the Summer Chart; it’s been ubiquitous on your town’s pop station, rock station, and other rock station for almost a year. The song made it this high on the summer chart with a slowburn in the top ten; ironically, it’s charted higher here than it ever made it on the Hot 100 (#3).

Could It Beat “Blurred Lines”? I don’t think so, not more than “Mirrors” or “Get Lucky”.

Why the Hell Not? “Radioactive” was a song everyone knew, but no one really loved; it just didn’t have that “wow” factor like a great solo or breakdown that made it anything other than fun to hear on the radio. It arrived as-is, and did its job without wanting more.

1. Robin Thicke ft. T.I. and Pharrell – Blurred Lines

How? “Blurred Lines” was part of pop culture site Grantland’s Battle for the Best Song of the Millennium a few weeks ago, and as that tournament wound down, someone quipped that it was going to be a “battle of the wedding songs”. Yeah, it’s a zing, but weddings are great ways to measure a song’s mass appeal because it’s the lone place where you have to cater to everyone’s taste. And “Blurred Lines” does that: the melody is kinda doofy, the beat is incessantly danceable, and it’s catchy. Even though he’s on the right side of “featured”, this one’s success does to Pharrell for that beat.

At the same time, the shitstorm around the song’s tacky video and repulsive-when-you-say-them lyrics poisoned its quality, but gave it a ton of media coverage that “Get Lucky” wouldn’t see unless the members of Daft Punk kicked a kitten. The controversy was more advertising than Thicke ever put into the song, so combine that with the song’s own catchiness, and of course it stayed around for the summer. It’s a polarizing pick–I still find “Blurred Lines” seven shades of gross and still jam out whenever I hear it, but it’s the pick: here is your song of the summer.

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Album Review: Janelle Monae – The Electric Lady

Posted on September 12, 2013 by bgibs122

Few current artists are labeled “deserves to be bigger” or “underrated” with the frequency of R&B singer Janelle Monae. Monae’s first album The ArchAndroid was met with rave reviews upon release in 2010, but hasn’t sold well in the three years since; putting her in the unfortunate dichotomy of being critically adored, but ignored by the mainstream.

But, then again, it fits an artist who seems to be defined by dichotomies. Monae dresses exclusively in luxurious formal-ware as a tribute to her parents’ working-class uniforms (she only wears black and white, to boot). Her music is steeped in the history of R&B’s past, while her lyrics tell a story of a dystopian future stretched across 1 EP and 2 albums. Her performance persona is that of an android that’s teeming with life and personality. Her music often speaks of matters of the heart, but sounds as though it comes from the head. The Electric Lady is a meticulously recorded, brainy album with intellectual references, but stripped of all of its heady concepts and themes, it still lays bare as damn good.

None of the context is necessary to enjoy, for example, the rollicking single “Dance Apocalyptic”, or the Prince assisted funk of “Givin’ Em What They Love”. Actually, the first half of The Electric Lady (christened “Suite IV”) is Monae at her most immediate and accessible. Lead single “Q.U.E.E.N.”, featuring R&B fixture Erykah Badu, lays down sci-fi keyboards counter to a ridiculously catchy guitar riff and a “Don’t fuck with me” empowering hook, while the title track sounds like Beyonce in a 60s girl-group mood. This first half is also the more cameo heavy; Prince and Badu are here as mentioned, and Solange Knowles shows up on the title track while Monae croons with Miguel on love jam “Primetime”.  The only minor slump in this first half is the discoy “We Were Rock & Roll”, which is one of the few times that the record’s numerous ideas get the better of the execution.

Suite V, meanwhile, is the more ornate section of an already embellished album. “It’s Code” starts the record’s back half on a high note: the song is great melodically between Monae’s top-of-her-game singing and the backing vocals in all the right places, and a careful listen turns up fantastic instrumentals from synths, strings, and textured guitars. “Ghetto Woman” has 70s shuffle, and the personal nature of the song as a tribute to Monae’s mother adds a human touch to an artist that typically aims for the head. Only in The Electric Lady‘s final stretch does it start sounding frazzled; “Victory”, “Dorothy Dandridge Eyes”, “Can’t Live Without Your Love”, “Sally Ride”, and “What An Experience” are all quality songs on their own, and form their own mini-suite together, but at least three of these sound like they’re the last song on the album. A 67 minute run time comes with some ending fatigue.

The first album that The Electric Lady reminded me of was Frank Ocean’s Channel Orange: they’re both time/genre blending, expansive, almost auteur projects that hide their details in storytelling and allegory (sidenote: I guess Daft Punk’s Random Access Memories would also fit, although I’m not sure the album had anything to say beyond “Music is great!”). Ocean tucked his personal experiences into songs such as “Forrest Gump” or “Bad Religion”, whereas Monae uses her android concept as a vehicle to express “the other”. Empowerment and racial/sexual identity are themes woven into The Electric Lady‘s circuitry, but they’re done in a way that doesn’t feel preachy. To the contrary, the album’s three skits with DJ Crash Crash of WDRD ground both the album’s abstract social themes and sci-fi narrative, and are still entertaining on their own (“Our Favorite Fugitive” in particular screams Does This Remind You of Anything with callers dropping lines such as “People like that” and “Robot love is QUEER!” It’s also kind of hilarious).

A common criticism Monae is that she’s emotionally aloof in her music, and The Electric Lady tries to alleviate that. “Q.U.E.E.N.”, especially its rapped final verse that references Queen Nefertiti, Harriet Tubman, Bernie Grundman, and Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? is practically Monae’s mission statement, while Suite V has affirmation in “Ghetto Woman”, and “It’s Code” and “Can’t Live Without Your Love” are tinged by Monae’s personal tribulations as well. It’s hardly intimate, but that’s another of her dichotomies: her work can sound mechanical and removed in story, but there are striking moments of unguarded, overwhelming emotions that are inspiring the show.

Little is more terrifying than listening to the second album of an artist who hit acclaim on arrival, but Janelle Monae made some great changes between The ArchAndroid and The Electric Lady. It’s a looser, more accessible collection of songs that still expands the scope of her sound, and has just about something for everyone. All of the craft present on her debut is still here, even as she throws more ideas in the mix. It’s a stretch to call The Electric Lady flawless, but its only discernible flaw is the excessiveness that’s a mark of almost every album that wants to do this much (again, Channel Orange). Regardless, it’s a minor quip with an otherwise fantastic album, five stars out of five.

tl;dr: There’s an R&B heart at the center of this Lady, 5/5

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Radio Rant: Robin Thicke ft. 2 Chainz and Kendrick Lamar – Give It 2 U

Posted on September 8, 2013 by bgibs122

Hello, and welcome to Radio Rants. We’re getting into the Thicke of it today.

(And 2 Chainz)

I’m bending my own rules a bit and dipping out of the top 20 of the Hot 100 to look at the follow-up to this year’s biggest one hit wonder: “Blurred Lines”. “Blurred Lines” made waves in and out of the music press this summer, and was truly controversial: its lyrics and video inspired enough thinkpieces and critiques to fill its own college course, but at the same time, the instrumental is untouchable. The ability to enjoy “Blurred Lines” was a blurred line itself.

So now, I say “thank you” to Robin Thicke. Thank you for clearing up any confusion around your likeability with the two pound bag of suck that is “Give It 2 U”.

Quick recap of Thicke’s career to date: guy’s been around for the last decade in the adult R&B scene before realizing that people only buy so many Marvin Gaye knock-offs, and slumping album sales suck. He decided he “wanted to have fun and be young again”, so he basically made a midlife crisis into a pop career. And while “Blurred Lines” was successful because of how fresh it was, “Give It 2 U” has the trademarks of someone pleading for relevance.

What else explains this turgid, dime-store Ke$ha beat?. “Give It 2 U” was produced by club overlord Dr. Luke, who, after having a stranglehold on the charts since 2010, is finally showing signs of slowing down. This squelching, distorted 8-bit beat just sounds tired, unfocused, and instantly dated. It has one cool hat trick with the disco stop-starts after the chorus, but otherwise, this ugly, confused beat tries and fails to have the pulsating verses and smooth chorus, and just sounds muddy as a result.

I thought that Bieber was our leading Justin Timberlake imitator, but Thicke has that higher pitched whisper-rap-singing thing down pact. But, like any imitation, it’s not the real thing, and Thicke sounds more bored and disengaged here than JT did on most of The 20/20 Experience. The guy that had fun using his full range on “Blurred Lines” was a no-show for this mess.

And now, for the worst part of “Give It 2 U”: the lyrics. If “Blurred Lines” was that older guy in the club shouting “Hey girl!” from the bar, “Give It 2 U” is the creepy older guy that keeps grinding on women, and only gives up once the Mace/security comes out. I never thought I’d consider “What rhymes with hug me?” clever, but it’s a step above the blunt come-ons here. To illustrate, the lyrics site RapGenius breaks down every line of a song and explains the meaning behind it. Thicke’s verses are so flat that the site translates them to “PENIS”.

“I got a hit for ya/Big dick for ya” We know. You’re actually being kinda…pushy about it. Like, dude, no one’s asking you to break out a ruler and drop trow. At least, I hope not.

“So I can come and take it off you/And get it off to you” Oh my fuck, we hit the low point. With “Get it off to you”, Robin Thicke just wrote you out of the equation. That’s not even “let’s have sex”, that’s “I’m going to jerk off to you later”. Ok, Thicke, bring out the rappers.

Both guys do a decent job. I get why 2 Chainz is here; he’s going to hype whatever he’s on, and what other rapper would dance in front of an ass float? His verse works, but he’s mostly here to bring fun. And I get why Kendrick Lamar’s here, but I don’t get why he’s here. I see the label’s reasoning of “Last year’s breakout rapper gets a ton of features”, but…Kendrick isn’t Ludacris, Nicki Minaj, or Lil Wayne. He can’t chameleon his way into any chartbuster, not without sounding a little brainy or weird. He might start his verse with having you sit on his face, but then raps about looking for you, meaning what he says, references an Olympic athlete, and caps it off with “I’m awful antsy, hope that convince you”. Bit of a long way from “I got a big dick for you”. He goes an alright job, but sounds like an awkward fit for this song, like he was picked more for being “What the cool kids like” than anything else.

I was ultimately conflicted over “Blurred Lines”, but “Give It 2 U” is just atrocious: the hook’s weak, the production’s overbearing, and the lyrics are awful. I never thought a song about fucking could be this joyless, or a song aiming for sensual could sound so confused. Thicke’s trying to escape the inevitable “one hit wonder” tag, but the sooner we forget about “Give It 2 U”, the better.

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Album Review: Nine Inch Nails – Hesitation Marks

Posted on September 5, 2013 by bgibs122

I’m sure that the day after Nine Inch Nails’ final date of their “Wave Goodbye” farewell tour in 2009, someone somewhere started counting the days until the next Nine Inch Nails album. Cynically, the fact that NIN still owed their old label a greatest hits comp ensured one or two polished B-sides or new one-offs would surface down the line (by NIN mastermind Trent Reznor’s admission, such an obligation birthed what would eventually become Hesitation Marks), but realistically, Reznor’s become too prolific to stay away from his main gig for long.

In one sense, Reznor is right on schedule. The five year wait between Hesitation Marks and NIN’s last album The Slip mirrors the five to six year gaps between the band’s first four albums. This time, instead of being held up releasing EPs, battling substance abuse, or recovery, he busied himself by scoring films, creating another band, and starting a family. By all accounts, he’s been upbeat and stable. The skinny guy that broke through in a torture-art music video found his way into a happy middle adulthood, who knew?

I bring up the skinny art-goth guy because Hesitation Marks is thinking about him, too. Even if the band’s hiatus was (relatively) short, this album still has hallmarks of a reunion album: everything’s a little bigger, a little more confident, and a little more self-aware. Hesitation Marks very much sounds like a Nine Inch Nails record, but has the most in common with Pretty Hate Machine and The Downward Spiral. It goes back to the more industrial/synth-pop structure, where the songs gradually unfold among synths and programmed drums, and the guitars are used for texture instead of hooks.

But Reznor and collaborating producers Atticus Ross and Alan Moulder, who have worked together on multiple projects, bring a refinement and sophistication to the album’s craft and production. The “standard” mix, while loud, gives the variety of sounds on the album room to breathe, and the “audiophile” mix enhances the album’s already large dynamic range. Simply put, you can slap  Hesitation Marks on everything from Apple earbuds to $1000 speakers, and the mix will sound great.

This approach gives songs like “Copy of A”, “All Time Low”, and “Various Methods of Escape” the time and room they need to build, develop, and ultimately pay off. “Copy of A”, released as a second single, serves as a great opener, and is exemplar of what is to come: a lone synth loop builds on top of a drum beat while other sounds bleep and bloop their way into the mix, with several instrumental sections. Of Hesitation Marks‘ three released singles so far, it’s been the best received. Interestingly enough, Hesitation Marks also signifies the first time that NIN’s sound has been…well, fashionable. Sure, it’s still left of center fair, but there’s a market for post-80’s smart guy electronic music now that didn’t exist in the 90s or 00s.

Lead single “Came Back Haunted” falls in the same territory as The Strokes’ “All the Time” on Comedown Machine, or “she found now” off m b v: it’s the safe, assuring “We’re still us” song that sounds overly familiar, but still pleasant. “Came Back Haunted” doesn’t inspire much until its chorus, which channels the pop-industrial sound that made “Closer” a hit. The song’s extended outro also brings that seminal hit to mind with a guitar reworking the “Closer motif”. Other single “Everything” is the most surprising NIN song to date; it’s effectively a bright, shiny New Wave tune that, aside from a glitchy chorus, espouses the band’s normal sound for manic guitar strums. It shouldn’t work, but the song’s so damn happy that it succeeds after the shock/novelty value wears off.

Other first half highlights include the previously mentioned glammy “All Time Low” and the ballad “Find My Way”. “Find My Way” calls the stuttering electronics and soundscapes of How To Destroy Angels to mind, as well as some of Ghost I-IV‘s moody piano. It’s another highlight. “In Two”, one of the more aggressive cuts on the album, featuring droning guitars and heavy drum beats, showing a possible new direction for NIN’s next release. Lastly, “I Would For You” blends the songcraft of With Teeth with Hesitation Marks‘ more textured approach; it’s arguably the best song here.

The biggest hurdles to Hesitation Marks are an extended runtime and poor pacing. The vast majority of the tracks reach the five to six minute mark, and some (“All Time Low”, “Various Methods of Escape”) take awhile getting off the ground; there isn’t a lot of immediate material here. The sequencing feels off as well: this LP of danceable beats doesn’t settle into a song-to-song groove at any point during its 61 minute runtime. Lopping ten or so minutes off that length in the form of lesser but passable cuts like “Satellite” or “Running” would go a long way.

Hesitation Marks obtains its name from “hesitation wounds”, which are shallow cuts made by testing a weapon before using it for suicide. Such a name fits this record: yes, there’s plenty of darkness around it, but there’s a thoughtfulness and a lightness present, too. Maybe you can survive everything, maybe this suicide doesn’t have to happen. A revelation like that can mean a new outlook on life, like a rebirth. While Hesitation Marks isn’t an instant classic, it shows Nine Inch Nails sounding as vital as ever, and opens new directions for the group to explore. Four out of five stars.

tl;dr: Nine Inch Nails comes back to life, sleeker and brighter than before, 4/5

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